Monday, February 27, 2006


Fingers pressed down on your jeans
Your eyes downcast
See where you're going all too well
You laugh and say you're fine
But I know I hear you sighing all the time
I think I've heard this 2 or 3 or 4 times now
But I still don't understand
Cos what you're wanting
Could well be where you're at now

Because we'd be fine if you'd start trying
To stop getting your attention through tension

I'm not sorry if it seems I can't care less
When it goes over your head you've gone
From sore eyes sight to sore all over
Almost overnight
Because it's hard enough for me
To come right out with what so easily stays in
And that's what I need you to see when I'm all sighed out
And I'm all sighed out because we'd be fine if you'd start trying
To stop getting your attention through tension...

(From The 1st Album - Download Here)

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Heaven or Las Vegas

So we did have quite a splendid time in Vegas. The food options for vegetarians SUCKED - it was pure hell. We didn't find a good restaurant til the last day, but at least we found it. We will have that sussed out next time.

Flight there was ROUGH (with my fear of heights and flying) but manageable with the ganja, Xanax, ganja cookies, and pints of rum in the airport bar, not to mention The Smiths on the palm pilot. I almost snapped The Old Lady's femur when I grabbed her leg during turbulence. Flight back was easy cos I was passed out the whole way.

The Stratosphere was a decent enough place, but with paper-thin walls. At the far north end of the strip, we had the best views of the Vegas ghetto. The service started out good and got progressively worse. One of the most disgusting buffets I've ever picked at (is it too much to ask for real mashed potatoes?!). We won't stay there again.

After checking in, we went to the casino floor to get it started. There's a bar next to the elevators...perfect. Order beer for The Old Lady, Scotch for me (what they have against the Irish in this town I'll never know). Naturally there's video poker machines built into the bar, so I decide to gamble my first couple of bucks. 5th hand and I get the mother of all hands - the Royal Flush. $65, baby!! Curses for betting only one quarter!

The luck stuck: $100 bucks on one spin at a "The Price Is Right" slot; $90 at roulette playing our birthdays and anniversary numbers; $12 bucks just getting rid of a few quarters in my pocket. And so on. It was great cos everything we bought (tour shirts, photos, etc.) was paid for by winnings. Not bad for a kid on a farmboy's wages.

The Sisters of Mercy...they should be called The Sisters of Merch, cos they have the best shirts ever. Fucking great show, mix a little muddy, and I screamed like a bitch the whole show. Next day I could barely speak. They played a bunch of new stuff that sounded great alongside the old faves, and I met a bunch of people I can honestly call new friends (see you next month, Gus!). One even paid for our cab back (thanks Mike!)!

Best part was when the soundguy's girlfriend asked me to stop whistling cos it was too loud for her. After clarifying that was indeed what she was asking of me, I leaned in and let her fucking have it. "Let me tell you what the deal is: we have come all the way from the San Francisco bay area to see one of my favorite bands ever. A band I haven't seen in over 10 years. I paid for my tickets over 2 months ago..." She tried to cut me off with an "Okay, okay", hoping I would shut up - no fucking way, bitch. I said quite curtly, "I'm NOT done yet. (Her eyes get huge) Understand this: I have no desire to make you uncomfortable and I'm not whistling in your ear on purpose, but there is no way I am going to stop whistling for this band. I travelled a long way to be here and will be as excited as I want to be, as loudly as I want to be." She took off shortly thereafter. Fuck with the bull, get the horns - fuck with my good time, get a VERY bad time in return.

Cirque du Soleil's "Mystere" is so mind-boggling I cannae do it justice. VERY interactive with the audience and one hell of a stage. Needless to say, we want to see the other shows they have going up there, including the naked one. Got a really good pic of us in our seats, and they even served one of my fave drinks - strawberry Captain Morgan daquiris!

Wayne Newton is a pimp, pure and simple. He's lost a bit of the smoothness of his voice, but he can still belt 'em out and is one hell of an entertainer. Funny, great band, classic was the Vegas we craved. Got to meet him afterwards: dressed in a black robe, wearing posh cologne, mackin' on tha ladies. He hugged me, kissed The Old Lady, and we got a couple of good pics with him. We fell asleep that night smelling of Wayne Newton's cologne.

All in all, it was an exhausing trip. The buildings are so huge, everything looks much closer than it really is. All the walking and shite food made me miss home so much...I almost cried when we got back and I saw my kitties. I had missed them so much I dreamt about them almost every night. Isabella, true to form, acted hurt and abandoned for a minute, then attacked me with kisses a minute later. I don't do well without the kitties, so I need to win the lottery so I can be one of those rich twats who takes their cats on vacation.

Oh, and by the way: $15 to ride a rollercoaster one time is for crackheads and rich people. Pics soon.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006


We have returned.

It was quite a time and I will tell you all the sundry details tomorrow or the next day. My voice is almost back, thankfully, after screaming like a little bitch at the Sisters show on Thursday. I still cannae sing certain notes which is pissing me off, but as Macca said: "It's getting better all the time".

The Old Lady was incredibly smart - she slept all day Sunday and yesterday. Yesterday I was up at 8a gardening and had a recording session all day. Needless to say, I'm fucking useless and she's perky as all hell. If she wasn't so fucking cute I'd hate her guts right now, but she is so I don't.

Oh yeah - go here and listen to our newest recording, "Killjoy". I put it there cos I love you. If you don't listen it will hurt my feelings, and since this is my first day without an hourly pint of Scotch I'm on shaky ground as it is...

Tuesday, February 14, 2006


We're off to go stay here.

They have this ride, and there is no motherfucking way I'm gonna go on it.

The reason for the season - here is Thursday night's entertainment:

Then we have Friday night's entertainment:

...and do NOT forget Saturday Night with Mr. Las Vegas!


Come home Sunday and curl up with The Old Lady while laughing about our adventures.

You can party here while we're gone, just make an effort to clean up after - we're leaving it spotless so show some love.

See you kids real soon.

Monday, February 13, 2006

48 Hours Til Vegas

...and the clock ticks...SLOWLY. I'm like a kid a couple of days before Christmas.

There will be no posting til Sunday or Monday, unless Miss Modular finds the time to post something.

Here's a download for you, but SHHHHH - we haven't released it yet:

Hope Chest - Monica's Light (Railway Children cover)

We're recording a ton of covers right now: Robyn Hitchcock, Brighter, New

Here's a picture of Wendy James for you:

When I win the lottery, I will make The Old Lady dress like this every day.

Well, every day that it's warm.

I hope I win $112,037.25 on the slots. I don't think that's too much to ask.

I stole this amazing time-waster from Smartypants (my current high score: 116). Smarty: yer the bee's knees (but so am I).

Saturday, February 11, 2006

Piss Off!

Friday, February 10, 2006

Can't Swing A Dead Cat Without Hitting A Concert (Updated)

Holy CRAP - this is what my current concert calendar looks like.

2.16 - The Sisters of Mercy
2.18 - Wayne Newton
2.24 - The Wedding Present
2.27 - Robyn Hitchcock

3.2 - Stereolab
3.4 - A DJ gig at some crazy candy raver party...should be fun
3.10 - Voxtrot
3.21 - Belle & Sebastian
3.22 - The Sisters of Mercy
3.23 - Hope Chest gig

Good heavens. Do you realise how much whiskey that adds up to?!?!

And for the record, I AM SO MOTHERFUCKING PISSED OFF that I didn't know David Gilmour is going on tour. He's gonna be at the Paramount in April, which is about 3 blocks from my work and incredibly beautiful. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuckety fuck. FUCK.

UPDATE: Added Stereolab. Gotta love the Bay Area. I am also pissed I will miss Saint Etienne whilst in Vegas. That is all.

Thanks, mdhatter

This comment in the "Ninja Kitties" post:

"...right before they killed a solicitor"

...was he selling feather dusters? My kits love their feather duster.

...was a total fucking JINX. We woke up yesterday to the front room literally COVERED in yellow feathers. I honestly thought we'd thrown the fucking thing away months ago, but it was hidden and Hazy somehow found the god damn thing and fucking destroyed it.

Next time, yer cleanin' up the mess, mister.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

I Can Sometimes Be A Cunt...

...but at least I'm never a twat. A comment from the oh-so-racist, regarding the funeral of Coretta Scott King:

"You evidently did live during the civil right era.
There was nothing peaceful about it.
If the truth be told, it was an extortion scam to enrich themselves. Mrs. King carried on this tradition. Anytime you wanted to use anything that was MLK, Jr. you had to pay Mrs. King.
Don't forget who the pupils were of this scam; Jesse Jackson, Joesph Lowery, and Hosea Williams. They practiced this extortion of Corporations all of their lives and some are still doing it.
So lets be honest, praise Mrs. King for the loss of a husband and who had to raise her children by herself, but don't latch on to a myth and try to make it true. "

The Civil Rights Movement of the 60's was an extortion scam. WOW.

UPDATE: I beat Digby to the punch! I AM THE MAN!!! From his post, another comment:

"They used the same tactics that Jesse Jackson uses to extrort money from Corporations. You pay or we picket."

Some dickheads live in glass houses with their pockets (and heads) full of rocks. I imagine it sucks to be this stupid, coupled with such a short memory.

Monday, February 06, 2006

Ninja Kitties

You can tell they are ninja kitties cos their eyes are glowing - it is a sign of their amazing power. This was right before they killed a solicitor (he was in the wrong place at the wrong time).

Weekend Ruminations

* The Super Bowl refs SUCKED.

* Though I was rooting for the Hawks, much props to the Steelers cos they are simply a fucking ace team (and as a Cowboys fan, that's not easy to say).

* Blackouts are occurring with more frequency when I drink a liter of whiskey.

* Recording sessions get less and less tedious over time.

* The Rolling Stones sounded like utter shit, but nowhere near as bad as that pre-game music. You've got Stevie Fucking Wonder up there - who gives a shit about his daughter or Joss Stone? Let the man fucking sing.

* Aaron Neville, whose testes never dropped, needs to go away.

* Homemade chili could bring world peace, if you made enough.

* I need to get a massage.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

I Love This Guy